I realised afterwards Sheel trained me for my kundilini raising (spiritual emergency), My notes which I wrote were my lessons leading to and culminating in this awesome experience.
During my crisis I had a battle with Evil. In my psychotic state I remembered creating the Atomic bomb. I could see my overalls, gloves and shoes, and I was with other people in the large shed/laboratory type building where we all worked. I was devastated that I had caused the deaths of so many and that I’d created such a monstrous weapon. I took personal responsibility and the burden of guilt was too much to bear. Yet my logical mind, what little was left of it, knew this could not possibly be true as I was an embryo at that time. Now, I realise that we are all responsible in our aspect of belonging to the group called humanity.
In my pain and guilt I made a vow that I’d work with the same material again and for the rest of my life. I’d use light for therapeutic purposes only. I still honour that vow.
Some time ago I had the privilege to be with someone during their own opening up and they took on the guilt of ‘bending time and ending the known universe’. The same horror overwhelmed them. But I did think of a book I’d read called The Philadelphia Experiment in which ‘we’ might have done just that!